A Diva State of Mind

It has been a LONG time since I’ve written personal post around the topic of dating and relationships, so here’s one for your enjoyment!

I met a guy last year through mutual friends; let’s call him RJ.  He was tall, dark and handsome and I can’t deny that we did have what I thought was chemistry.  We would see each other at events in the city so it was inevitable that we exchanged information.

Now I have heard from some guys say that they don’t mind if a female takes a little initiative when it comes to approaching them.  We’re in our mid/late twenties; that shouldn’t even be an issue, but to some guys it is. Anyway, liking what I saw, I asked RJ out on a few occasions last year and he would either not respond or respond too late.

After a while, I came to my senses and just stopped reaching out all together. I figured, if he was really interested, he would respond or be proactive in trying to hang out.  Months passed and I received a text message from RJ suggesting that we hang out and catch up. Thoughts in my head “ummm…I think he meant to text that to someone else.”

To keep the story short, let’s just say after that text message, we talked on the phone quite frequently for a couple weeks getting to know each other and even talked about hanging out, but of course none of that transpired.  When it came to hanging out, again he just wasn’t very proactive and I for one do not beg anyone to spend time with me. Either you want to or you don’t.

Similar to the “Where Is The Follow Thru” dilemma, ladies also face the “playing hard to get” dilemma, if that’s what you want to call it.  In public, the guy flirts and comes across as interested, but nothing ever goes beyond that. Now that may have been cute in college, but I am grown and I do not have the time or patience for games.  You are either interested or you are not. It’s really that simple.

Fellas, do some of you (I refuse to group you all into one category because I know you’re all the same) act this way just to boost your ego?  Is it exciting to know that there are women you are interested in you? Why commit to something so small like hanging out if you’re really not interested in doing so?

I guess this is just another case of someone wasting my Verizon text messages and minutes because of course he had Sprint….

H&M is at it again! After much success with the exclusive Lanvin Collection for H&M, the major retailer is teaming up with Versace for an exclusive collection made of 40 women’s pieces, 20 men’s pieces and a collection of high fashion accessories, all at H&M prices!

According to H&M Creative Advisor “Versace is one of the most important brands of recent times and their collection for H&M will be glamorous and extraordinary, everything Versace stands for. Versace is sharing with us iconic designs from the archives. This is such a celebratory collaboration and is perfect for the festive season.”

The collection will launch November 17th and will be available in 300 H&M stores. Versace is also launching a Pre-Spring 2012 collection, available January 19, 2012.

High end fashion at affordable prices available for the masses, LOVE IT!!! Check out a few looks and video of Donatella Versace and H&M Creative Advisor discussing the new collection below:

You already know the line outside a H&M store is going to be ridiculous once the collection is launched! I must admit, for this collection, I may be one of the many out there eagerly waiting for the doors to open on November 17th.  Who wants to join me?!

Source: Glamazon Diaries and The Style & Beauty Doctor

On June 25, the Miami Takeover Sweepstakes culminates with a Rooftop Day Party sponsored by Barefoot Wine & Bubbly at Eden Ultra Lounge.  Wylie K. & Friends and VP Productions, co-planners for the 4^th Annual Miami Takeover, will hold a drawing to select the winner of an all expense-paid trip to South Beach Miami, FL July 22-25.

The Road to Miami Takeover Part II, a rooftop day party, will be hosted by MC Crown Royal and LC with music by Stormin Norman, Dee Jay Casper and DJ Deuce Juan.  Sweepstakes raffle tickets may be purchased through June 25th and at the event for $5. The sweepstakes winner does not need to be present.

Date: June 25, 2011

Time: 2pm to 8pm

Location: Eden Ultra Lounge (1716 I Street NW, Washington, DC)

Tickets: $10 in advance at http://bit.ly/kbSrPJ

Watch the video recap of Road to Miami Takeover Part I featuring Jay-Z’s DJ Young Guru and Ciroc Boy DJ Quicksilva from the April 30 event at Café Asia: http://vimeo.com/23436178

The 4^th Annual Miami Takeover July 22-25 is an unforgettable experience providing full access to the best of Miami nightlife.  Presented by Wylie K. & Friends and VP Productions, this four day, three night experience provides attendees with a Weekend Party Pass that allows them to experience the best of Miami nightlife.

To learn more about Miami Takeover visit www.miamitakeover2011.com, follow @MIATakeover2011 on Twitter, like Wylie K. Y Friends on Facebook http://www.facebook.com/thewkandfgroup or stay connected on Tumblr http://miamitakeover.tumblr.com/.

I am a mentor and member of the Leadership Committe for Capital Partners for Education (CPE). CPE is a college preparatory program designed to help high school students in the DC area overcome barriers that would prevent them from attending college.  Students attend charter schools in the DC area through scholarships, receive academic support and are partnered with a mentor.  I currently mentor a rising senior at Elizabeth Seton High School.

This year, CPE is hosting Soiree For Success Happy Hour Fundraiser to raise funds to assist in sending students to one of the participating charter high schools and to continue to provide academic support and the mentor program.

Date: Wednesday, June 22nd

Time: 6:30pm to 8:30pm

Location: Georgia Brown’s Rooftop (950 15th Street NW)

Tickets: $50

In the event of rain, the happy hour will be moved into the lobby area of the main building. The $50 general admission ticket includes delicious Georgia Brown’s cuisine and open bar.  There will also be a silent auction and raffle prizes include stays at Kimpton Hotel and facial & massage services from MINT.

I hope you are able to attend the event this Wednesday.  You already spend $50 for a night out in the city, so why not spend $50 at a happy hour that supports a GREAT cause?!

Tickets can be purchased at http://tinyurl.com/soireeforsuccess

To view pictures from last year’s “Mix It Up” event click here: http://www.flickr.com/photos/flores78/sets/72157624355355518/show/

To learn more about CPE, visit http://www.cpfe.org

For the past few weeks, I have been trying to figure out what makeup I should use for the summer. The goal was to find lightweight products that could replace foundation during the hot humid months but still give me an even skin tone and natural glow.

After much research via online magazines, blogs, tweets and Google, I found a few products that will work great for the summer.   The key is to use light products; no one wants to wear a ton of heavy makeup in the summer, especially in the DC humidity.

Primer is a great base to use before applying tinted moisturizer (and foundation). Primer is light and helps keep makeup on longer during the day.  Tinted moisturizer is a great alternative to foundation this summer. It’s similar to applying your daily moisturizer, but adds a little color to even out your skin tone.  Depending on the weather, sometimes my skin is oily, so I chose Laura Mercier Oil Free Tinted Moisturizer. When searching for a moisturizer, look for ones that have an SPF.  Gotta protect the skin from the UVA/UVB rays!

One of my favorite makeup products for summer is bronzer!  It looks great over tinted moisturizer however it can be worn on its own. If you don’t want to wear it over tinted moisturizer, apply after your daily moisturizer and you’re ready to go! It is a great product to use to give your skin a fabulous glow.

Now I’m no makeup expert, but I do know that these three products are a great place to start in terms of summer makeup.  Take the time and research which tinted moisturizers will work best for you.  I chose to go with Laura Mercier because I have read great reviews online. It is a lightweight moisturizer that looks great on all skin tones.

Remember ladies, makeup should enhance your natural beauty. It should NOT give you a new face!!! This past weekend, I saw women walking around looking like their face was melting because they had so many layers of makeup on and it was extremely hot outside.  That is the look we want to avoid!

A Diva State of Mind is a finalist for the Black Weblog Awards BEST LIFESTYLE BLOG Category. THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU for taking the time to nominate the blog for the category!!!

I’m writing this post because I need your help again! Today is the last date to vote for the 2011 Black Weblog Awards. If you’re new to the site, please stay awhile and check out the blog posts.  If you like what you see, please click HERE and vote A Diva State of Mind for BEST LIFESTYLE BLOG Category. If you’ve been to the site before, love it and haven’t voted yet, I need your vote too! Everyone is allowed to vote ONCE PER COMPUTER.

Songtress Marsha Ambrosius  released a new video for her next single “Late Nights & Early Mornings” from her current album Late Nights & Early Mornings. I love this song (actually I love the entire album) and the video; Ambrosius delivers a very strong message.

Considering I recently wrote a blog post on women carrying condoms, this video could not have been more on time! We are shown two women who engage in sexual relations with their significant other.  Both women pull out protection before doing the do; one women uses protection while the other listens to her partner and does not which turns out to be a life altering decision.

Ladies, if your partner objects to using protection, he is not worthy of the cookies. Plain & simple!! Wrap it up and know your status and your partner’s status.

If you haven’t done so already, please do yourself a favor and get your hands on a copy of Marsha Ambrosius album Late Nights & Early Mornings!!

Now that Beyoncé has returned from her year hiatus, we can expect to see her EVERYWHERE this summer (magazines, blogs, entertainment shows, etc).  She recently teamed up with Dazed & Confused  Magazine for the July 2011 issue.  High fashion at its finest!

Photographer: Sharif Hamza

Designers: Tom Ford, Marc Jacobs, Gareth Pugh, Haider Ackermann, Givenchy Couture

After a very public divorce last year, Dwyane Wade gained full custody of his two boys.  In honor of Father’s Day, Wade recently wrote a letter in Newsweek discussing life as a single father. When I read it, I knew I had to share it with others; I absolutely loved it!

My Life as an NBA Superstar Single Dad:

There are a few words that come to mind when I think about the past couple years of my life: challenging, rewarding, transformative—they roll off the tip of my tongue in an instant. In the span of a year my two good friends LeBron James and Chris Bosh joined me on the Miami Heat, I struggled through a painful, public divorce, and I became the full-time parent to my two young sons, Zaire and Zion.

I’ve had some ups and downs lately, but the memories of the unpleasant times disappear quickly, in part because of moments like the one recently when I was able to surprise my younger son, Zion, at his school with cupcakes for his fourth birthday. It was the day after we’d won the Eastern Conference finals, but that victory couldn’t compare with the huge smile on Zion’s face at that moment. I will never forget it. Bad memories vanish each morning when I walk into both of my sons’ bedrooms to wake them up for school—their laughter gives me all I need to face whatever is happening in my life. Not too long ago, due to custody issues, I wasn’t allowed to see my sons for long periods of time, or was given the chance to see them for only a few hours with no idea of if or when I’d see them again. I can’t describe how trying those days were, fighting for full custody while also working as a professional basketball player nine months of the year. I just knew I wanted to be with my kids.

I was seriously motivated to be a full-time parent for my sons. My mother and father weren’t together when I was a kid growing up in Chicago, and early on my mother fell victim to drug abuse. At 9 years old, I moved in with my father because my mother could no longer care for me. Looking back, I now see so many similarities between my own childhood and that of my sons. My father stepped in when I needed him, and that gave me the chance for a better life. That’s what I’m doing for my boys now.

All children need their fathers, but boys especially need fathers to teach them how to be men. I remember wanting that so badly before I went to live with my dad. I wanted someone to teach me how to tie a tie and walk the walk, things only a man can teach a boy. Of course, back then, I never could have imagined being in the same situation someday with my own kids. My dad and I bumped heads a lot—we were so alike, both of us born competitors. My older son, Zaire, is exactly the same way. We’ll battle on the court when I’m 39 and he’s 19. He’s 9 now, and he’s grown up with basketball. Zion could take it or leave it, which is cool by me.

Today, I constantly tell my dad how much I appreciate what he did for me. I think you really have to become a parent to understand what you will endure to be there for your kids. I could say I was surprised at the criticism I received for traveling from Miami to Chicago so often during the regular season for my custody court cases, but nothing really surprises me anymore. I had a duty to fight to be with my kids, and I did it.

Thankfully, I’ve gotten a lot of support from my mother, sister, and others in taking care of my boys and making their new living arrangements a smooth and happy transition. Going forward, I want my sons to have a healthy relationship with their mother, and that’s something we’re working on. I hope to have a great relationship with her one day too, because I know how much it meant to me to see my parents get along as time went on.

I can’t say what we’ll do for Father’s Day, because since my sons came to live with me about two months ago, every day has been like Father’s Day. I just want people—men, and men of color in particular—to hear my story and know that their children need them and that it’s their responsibility to be there for them. We have to step up as men and do our part. There are no excuses.

I love seeing a man, especially a black man step up and be there for his children. I hope Dwyane Wade’sletter inspires other black men to take care of their responsibility. Children, especially young black boys, need their fathers!

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